11th year love note
My favorite son-shine….
It’s been a couple of years since I have sat to write you this letter on the day of your birth. We have been through hell and back in that time. Together, but none-the-less, we have walked a path. Not a path that we purposefully asked to walk, but one that I will always cherish we had each other for. It has continued to shape you as a young man, and us, as a family.
You see, son, during this past two years, your Daddy fought and lost his battle with pancreatic cancer. We walked that journey together, with him, and we held onto each other through the highs and the lows. The pain and the loss. I was so proud of you for never wavering, and being present, even when it was incredibly hard. Now that he is gone, we are walking together through the changes in our lives together that move us forward. Together, we will find the next chapters of a beautiful life we have waiting. I can’t even begin to describe how much hope, pride and happiness you brought during the last couple of years. You don’t even understand what most meant, or that you were even a force during the time in which you were. Yet, there you stood. You were there for your Dad, myself, and all of our family. There you continued to show up, with a smile. There, in that space, you continued to grow, to flourish, learn and become the young man that I stare at today. It’s unbelievable really. The fact that you have been through a loss, that many adults have never faced. And you have come from that loss as a uniquely strong, courageous and happy young man. You are truly remarkable son.
At 11, oh how you have grown up. I keep saying 11 going on 22. You have this incredible gift of knowledge and confidence when it applies to your academics. You have a strong expectation of yourself, and you keep the pressure applied. This has resulted in honor rolls, recognitions, and achievements during a time, at school, that is unusual to say the least. During 2020, and now into 2021, we have been dealing with the Covid-19 Pandemic. Last spring you were not in school, in-person. Truthfully, we faltered, while Daddy was really sick. You returned to school in August, just a couple of weeks after your Daddy passed away, and you have not looked back. You just continue to reach new goals, and new achievements. You have been participating in the 6th grade math (middle school) class, although you are a 5th grader. Your reading and levels are off the charts. You have done your best to continue to meld with your peers, and you surround yourself with friendships of all types. There is truly not a single walk of life, that you are not kind to, and not afraid to join with. Your talents and appreciation for dance, music, swim, and this year, baseball, have continued in the absence of the classes you so adored before they were paused. Where there is a will, there is a way. There is hope, and soon the world will be a bit more back to normal. You have managed to get really good at your video game obsessions, and have become closer to your Pigati cousins, and many other friends, in the absence of team sports.
Your spirit continues to lift me daily. There are many days that you provide me the reason I need to breathe, to work harder, to seek out happiness and continue down the path of this life we now live together. I watch you, and I learn. You have taught me grace. Kindness and understanding. I now look forward to the days of your growth as a pre-teen, teen, a young man, and even someday with a family or future of your own. I know that I will find happiness through you and your desires. Your path is bright. You continue to light that way. You make me so ridiculously proud. You provide such immense joy in my life. I cannot ever thank the universe enough for giving me you. Back and to the moon baby.
You will always be my forever.
Love, Mom
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